The other day when we arrived to play music for our hospice friend, he was in the middle of an intense game of Bingo. He had told us previously that he loved playing Bingo and that he wins often, so I didn’t want to interrupt him. He’s now too weak to put the chips on his own board so he has a friend help but he keeps a close eye on him to make sure he doesn’t miss any numbers.
When he saw that we were there he reached out for my hand and smiled at me. I gave him my hand and he held on while they finished the final coverall round of Bingo. He lifted my hand up to rest on his neck and cheek and said, “Your hand is so cold.” We held hands for probably 15 minutes and I’m shocked that I didn’t cry. It was the sweetest thing. After we played music I held his hand for a minute when I said goodbye. I told him, “Now YOUR hand is cold!” and laughed. When I got home I made this to help me remember those special moments.
I think we sometimes forget how much all humans need physical touch. It’s just been the last couple of years that I’ve really gotten more comfortable with non-sexual touch with friends and family and I don’t know how I survived so long without it. I also think we sometimes forget about the needs in general of our elders. Just visiting this man for one hour each week has brought a lot of light to him, to the other residents where he lives, and to us as volunteers.
You are only one person but you matter. You have the ability to make a positive difference in the world. Even if it’s really small scale, every kind action has a ripple effect. Don’t forget that being the change you wish to see can be really simple. Keep your bright light shining, friends.